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The Sunday Telegraph has learned a government-commissioned review, expected to be led by Reg Bailey, chief executive of the Mothers' Union, will lay the ground for new laws which could see individual companies prosecuted.
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After all, if people are given free speech they'll only start using it, and that ould be terrible.
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Ministers at the Department for Education intend to "legislate or regulate" against the worst offenders, many of whom have already sparked fierce criticism from parents.
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GYAC: if you don't like it, then don't fucking buy it. Have a bit of personal responsibility for once in your worthless little life.
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The move is strongly backed by David Cameron, who hit out at the premature sexualisation of children in one of his first major interventions as Conservative leader, more than four years ago.
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Yes, to be entirely fair we should have paid more attention to this, instead of letting ourselves get caught up in the "well no one can possibly be as bad as Labour" fervour.
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"The Lolita beds and the padded bras and the rest of it, in the end most of those products were withdrawn because of parental pressure, so let's help the parents to put that pressure on.
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After all, why should they have to take responsiblity for their own actions? That's what the government's here for. What was that? Tory? Oh no, you must be confusing me with someone else.
Still, I guess that once they've finished selling off all the schools and universities people's reasoning skills aren't going to be that great, so maybe thinking on people's behalf in this way is merely preparing for the inevitable decline.
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Mr Bailey, a father of two and committed Christian
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Well there's someone who'll have a neutral, scientific point of view. I can't wait for the Abu Hamza review on
Whether Stoning Adulterers Is a Good Thing.
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irresponsible advertising and marketing
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When I leave a party at 2am and decide that the quickest ay back to my hotel is to wander hopefully but maplessly through some of the poorest slums in Africa, that's irresponible. When I try to sell a 12 year-old a padded bra that's a sensible and well-calculated business plan.
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and take steps to tackle the commercialisation and sexualisation of childhood
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Give 'em less pocket money. Next.
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Ministers worry that many youngsters – boys as well as girls – feel they have to live up to airbrushed images of thin celebrities in magazines and advertisements.
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We're running out of fossil fuels and key minerals used in the hi-tech sectors. Our debt has risen to massive levels and we may well be heading into the second half of a double dip recession worse than any we have seen since the 30s. Climate is changing, with extreme weather becoming more frequent. The old America-centric world order is shifting, leading to greater international instability and the rise of fierce competition between blocs and emerging superpowers. The European Union is going through serial crises and we can't decide whether we want to be in the centre or on the periphery. China is making threatening noises in the economic, military and IT domains. Nuclear proliferation is a serious threat. And you morons are worried that teenage girls wish their tits were bigger?
Christ, you're right Contra. We need to shoot these idiots right away before they do any more damage.