Last April ThinkGeek advertised canned unicorn meat as "the other white meat":

Pâté is passé. Unicorn - the new white meat.

Excellent source of sparkles!

Unicorns, as we all know, frolic all over the world, pooping rainbows and marshmallows wherever they go. What you don't know is that when unicorns reach the end of their lifespan, they are drawn to County Meath, Ireland. The Sisters at Radiant Farms have dedicated their lives to nursing these elegant creatures through their final days. Taking a cue from the Kobe beef industry, they massage each unicorn's coat with Guinness daily and fatten them on a diet comprised entirely of candy corn.

As the unicorn ages, its meat becomes fatty and marbled and the living bone in the horn loses density in a process much like osteoporosis. The horn's outer layer of keratin begins to develop a flavor very similar to candied almonds. Blending the crushed unicorn horn into the meat adds delightful, crispy flavor notes in each bite. We are confident you will find a world of bewilderment in every mouthful of scrumptious unicorn meat.

The wheels of bureaucracy turned and turned. Finally a 12-page letter arrived from a law firm representing the US National Pork Board:

First, the Unicorn Meat thing never, ever used the phrase "The Other White Meat."

Second, parody is protected.

And third, finally, definitely, notwithstanding and rendering completely moot any and all other possible considerations, Faegre and Benson are tools, utter Devinians, and an abject disgrace even to their sorry profession.

__________________
"Neither man nor nation can exist without a sublime idea."
Fyodor Dostoyevsky, 1821 - 1881
QOTD

My BLOG: Things Have Changed

Wow, epic.